


Bucky Barnes And The Girl With Too Much Power

by storiesaboutvan



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Bucky Barnes Feels, Bucky Barnes Has Issues, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Bucky Barnes Recovering, Eventual Fluff, F/M, Hurt Bucky Barnes, Mutual Pining, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Possible Eventual Smut, Reader Has Powers, Reader-Insert, She/her pronouns for reader, Stark Tower, Stark Tower Still Exists, editing for typos, enhanced!reader, infinity war and endgame NEVER HAPPENED, possible eventual angst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-17
Updated: 2020-04-27
Packaged: 2020-09-06 00:07:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,740
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20282131
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/storiesaboutvan/pseuds/storiesaboutvan
Summary: Nobody knows about your power. You've never really wanted to use it, let alone hurt someone with it. But, someone has figured you out, and now they're following you. There's only one place you can go for help - The Avengers. Good news is they're good people. Bad news is your power is entirely relevant to soft, sad, recovering, broody Bucky Barnes.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first Bucky fic! In fact, my first fic outside of Van McCann (Catfish and the Bottlemen) I'm publishing... So... constructive feedback is very welcome! Please let me know if you read this, and if you like it, etc. 
> 
> I will update the rating, trigger warnings, and tags with (possible) future chapters.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nobody knows about your power. You've never really wanted to use it, let alone hurt someone with it. But, someone has figured you out, and now they're following you. There's only one place you can go for help - The Avengers. Good news is they're good people. Bad news is your power is entirely relevant to soft, sad, recovering, broody Bucky Barnes.

You believed in multiple universes. It seemed almost reckless to keep a closed mind in the age of the superhero. And, it was illogical to rule anything out given your own personal… experiences. However, in all the alternative universes you had imagined, you'd not ever thought your first interaction with The Avengers to be like this. Yes, of course you'd pictured them helping you, saving you. But in the 'you’re a citizen of the world and they save you by saving your city' kind of way… Not the… 'hi, I've turned up on your doorstep with a very individualised need for assistance' kind of way. 

Yet… life is strange. 

"So, let me get this straight. You just- _told_ them to let you in?" Tony asked, to which you nodded. "How-"

"It doesn't matter. You've just gotta listen-" you pleaded. 

Your arrival had sent the room into a bit of a tizz. Of the six people occupying it, only one remained seated. Tony Stark swung casually back and forth in the expensive office chair. He hardly even kicked away from the table when you walked in, lead by a member of security. When the seasoned guard looked terrified, spitting out, "I-I- I don't…," everyone moved with lightning speed. 

Steve Rogers and Wanda Maximoff both stood, stepping to position themselves in a better vantage point. Wanda's fingers twitched with anticipation. They were the most trusting in the room; an ironic twist in their personalities that probably was the foundation for their friendship. 

Sam Wilson was arguably the most vulnerable Avenger in attendance. He was a solider, so fell into formation quickly. Even without his iconic shield, Steve was still that, and Sam stood just behind him, on his right. 

Lastly, with only a second between the two actions, both Bucky Barnes and Natasha Romanov pulled guns on you. Movements so fluid, it was a shock when you realised they were armed. Where had their weapons come from? 

All eyes were tracking you carefully, assessing your potential for threat, trying to place your face. 

Your hands went up, white flag, and you told the security guard he could go. When he returned to his position near the entrance of Stark Tower, he was confused and just a little horrified. He watched the boardroom on the camera monitor, not sure what the protocol was. 

"I'm sorry," was the first thing you said to the room. 

"Who are you?" Tony asked. "How did you get in here?" 

"I just told him I needed to see you. Please, I need-"

"So, let me get this straight," he said so casually that it felt like it took a century to get the words out. "You just- told them to let you in? How-"

"It doesn't matter. You just gotta listen-"

"Ah, no. No, we don't gotta to do anything," he interrupted, finally standing. He took a step closer to you. Natasha's eyes tracked his movements, her objective to cover him. "You got a power there, huh? Wanna join the team?" Although he was mocking your seriousness, there was something in his tone that told you that he would give you an audience. You'd piqued his curiosity. 

You nodded. "Nobody knows…" When they didn't stop you from speaking, you continued. "…about me. But… there's people following me. So…" 

"You think someone knows you have a… power?" Steve asked. At the sound of gentleness in his voice, your shoulders rolled in a little. Only Bucky clocked the slight relaxation. 

"I don't know how they could know," 

"Could just be your run-of-the-mill stalker?" Tony suggested with a shrug.

"I can tell the difference," you retorted. 

"How?" 

"She's a woman, Tony," Natasha stated like he'd asked the most stupid question he could. 

"Alright then. Entertain us. Show us what you've got," Tony offered, falling back into his chair. Nobody followed his lead. 

"I can just tell-"

"No, no. Where's the drama in that? Where's the-" His sentence ended with jazz hands instead of words. When you went to speak, he shushed you. It happened twice and it made you feel like a child, so you didn't try again. You were not the only person in the room growing impatient. "Do you need a volunteer?" Tony asked, concluding that's why you'd not done anything. "Step up, Heavy Metal," he barked at Bucky. 

When you turned to Bucky, his gun was already lowering and he was moving towards you. It wasn't in obedience to Tony, but out of genuine inquisitiveness. To him, you seemed small and human and he was secretly excited to see what you could do. Steve never belonged in the future, but Bucky loved 2019. 

"Not you," you told him. 

His expressionless mask faltered for a moment. Everyone noticed. Bucky's eyes were locked on yours and he was searching for a reason why not him. Did you think he couldn't take it? Were you scared of him? 

Nobody said anything. 

Searching for the words and failing all you could do is make the smallest of shakes with your head and will him to understand. But, he took another step forward. 

_Okay._

You were already sorry. 

"Give me the gun," you whispered with so much hesitation that for a second you thought it didn't work. Then he handed it to you. The room was deadly still and silent. To calm nerves, you held the gun out, not looking at whoever quickly took it from you. Bucky was wide-eyed. 

You said, a little louder, "Kneel." 

When Bucky fell to his knees, you could hear the sharp intake of breaths. 

"I'm sorry," you told him. "I…" 

He could have got up immediately, propelled himself to the other side of the room. Bucky was still on his knees though. His eyes were glazed over. Only Steve could tell he was on the verge of tears. 

It had been a while since Bucky had no control of his body. He'd forgotten what it felt like. Heavy in the air was this thought, on everyone's minds. 

You stepped away from Bucky, looking over at the others. "I just say it and people do it…" you offered like your power hadn't just become painfully clear. 

When Steve moved towards Bucky, it seemingly broke the spell. Bucky stood on his own, moving to the corner of the room, watching you with his arms folded across his chest. He shared a moment with Steve, who then finally returned to his chair. Like it was permission, Wanda and Sam sat too. Natasha was still covering the room. 

"You can sit," Steve said on a breath out. He kept glancing over at Bucky. You wanted to too, but thought it would only serve to antagonise the situation. "Who do you think is following you?" 

When you had told them everything you could, which wasn't much, they left you in the room.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bucky checks in on you while you're in limbo, waiting for a decision from The Avengers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A HUGE thank you to the people that left kudos, and an even bigger cyber hug to the commenters! I'm so psyched that people are keen on this fic and the support has definitely motivated me to keep writing it. Thank you so, so fucking much. 
> 
> Alright, we get some Bucky/Reader one-on-one time here, but it's a very short chapter. Once I started to write the dialogue, I realised I wasn't at all sure that it sounded like Bucky. So, instead of a long chapter of bullshit, here's a short chapter that I'd love some feedback on. Is the dialogue Bucky enough for you? xo Rhi

It wasn't a prison cell, that's for sure. It was almost a small hotel suite, only a touch more clinical. Compared to your own bedroom though, it wasn't home. It wasn't comfortable, nor comforting. The room served to detain you while you sat in a background check, moral compass limbo. Somewhere else in the building, deep in the secret spaces of Stark Tower, a group of heroes sat discussing your fate. All you could do was pace from window to ensuite and back again. 

Everybody was in agreeance that your story was worth a test of validity. If what you said was true, then someone had a method of seeking out powered people. And, not just those with abilities and faces splashed across the news like themselves, Jessica Jones or Luke Cage. Someone found you. That alone was just the tip of the hypothetical iceberg. It also begged the question… What did they want with you? 

As good as they were, it was only one in the group of six that thought all of this only _after_ being concerned for your wellbeing. It took Wanda a good minute to catch up to the others' conspiracy theories and climbing heartrates. She had been the one to walk you to the detention suite, softly spoken and apologetic about the circumstances. When you were locked in, you could hear her on the other side of the door hesitate for a moment before leaving to join the others. 

When Wanda sat down at the table, she pulled a tablet close and began to read through the data already being collected on you. The room felt off somehow. Her friends were on edge. Steve, in particular, seemed… _something_… Wanda couldn't read him. That's when she noticed the absence of Bucky. 

Only Steve, Sam, and Natasha were seated around the oval table. Tony was pacing, talking to F.R.I.D.A.Y. about you. He had a cup of coffee in one hand, and his other waved around. Wanda put it together then; whatever Bucky said or did to leave the party, it had unsettled Steve. It wasn't necessarily a _bad_ thing - Steve wasn't sad or angry or worried - but it must have been a rare thing. 

Wanda stopped analysing the room and started to flick through digital files. "What was the point?" she asked then. Everybody looked up from their work to Wanda. "_Locking_ her up. What was the point?" 

… 

You wondered what the point of locking you in a room was. Did The Avengers feel safer that way? Maybe they felt more in control. Really, all that stood between you and getting out was a phone call, getting redirected to Stark Tower and hey presto - magic - bam - confetti - you'd have someone there within minutes. 

They'd seen it in your face though. There was abject fear and a lack of options. Each and every one of them had been there, in one way or another. They knew you weren't going anyway. 

But someone was coming to you. 

The rapping of knuckles on the door startled you. When you squeaked you felt stupid for it. Hopefully, the knocker didn't hear. 

He did. He bit back a smile too. 

"Uh… Come in," you called, again confused at the point of the locked door. 

As the door opened, you stood up, bringing with you a throw pillow from the bed you'd been sitting on between perimeter paces. Hugging it to your chest was a completely unconscious action. It wasn't until Bucky Barnes stepped into the room and you saw his eyes flick from your face to the pillow and back again that you even realised you were holding it. Putting it down now seemed like an even more awkward course of action, so you let yourself keep it. 

Bucky left the door ajar, then came to stand in front of you. He knew the exact distance to leave to not be threatening, but not be eerie either. He'd learnt that lingering on the edges unnerved people. It was a habit he'd formed to keep himself safe or unseen, but Steve and Sam were constantly reminding him that he _was_ safe now.

"I'm sorry!" you blurted out before Bucky could say anything. His eyebrows pulled together in confusion, but the floodgates had been opened and you weren't really watching him for a reaction. "I'm so, so fuckin' sorry. I said-I said, like, if I got this far and I got to… show you, that it wouldn't be you, you know? Because… Fuck. I'm just…" 

When you waltzed your way in to see The Avengers, you knew you'd have to show them your power. Over and over, you'd made yourself promise that it wouldn't be Bucky or Clint Barton. Honestly, none of them were great options. Their sense of independence and autonomy was paramount to them being… stable… okay… alive. It just seemed cruel to take that away, even for a second. All the way over to the tower you'd had your fingers crossed, repeating over and over, 'don't let Bucky be there, don't let Bucky be there, don't let Bucky be there.'

He let you speak, let you say what you thought you needed to. There were only so many times you could apologise though. 

"I'm sorry," you whispered again, voice cracking. You threw the pillow aside, frustrated. 

Bucky couldn't remember the last time someone was so considerate of his very specific history. The others treated him with semi-hostile gentleness. It was weird. He was a war hero, the longest-serving P.O.W. in fact. But he was also The Winter Solider. Even The Avengers found it hard to reconcile that into one normal approach to his presence. "It will take time," Steve assured him, "But they'll get there." 

"It's alright," Bucky spoke. You watched him watch you. "I… insisted," he reasoned with a shrug of his left shoulder. "And, you weren't in the position to be makin' demands." 

He looked sorry for you. 

"Have you's decided?" you asked after a few beats of nothing. 

"Ah... no, well, maybe. I don't know. I didn’t go with them." 

You expected him to explain, but he didn't, so you just nodded. 

The world had co-existed with powered people and superheroes for a while now, definitely for your lifetime. You grew up with stories about Captain America, and a dozen other myths and legends. In 2008 Tony Stark outed himself, and from there society just had to get used to the fact humans weren't top of the pecking order anymore. You had turned 18 that year and had finally been granted some relief to the painful alienation you felt. You weren't the only one. Now, you wondered if Bucky had got that moment.

When he came out of brainwashing, when Steve pulled him back into the light, did Bucky finally get to feel like he wasn't entirely alone? Did he look around at the kid spider and talking raccoons in absolute wonder? Or did he still feel that cold isolation? 

Another few beats of nothing had gone by. He looked like he was moving to leave, his body turning only slightly but enough to prompt more words from your mouth. "You on babysitting duty then?" 

He smiled. His whole fucking face lit up when he smiled. 

With a sly tilt of the head, Bucky said so casually, "Don't think I'd be much use against you." 

A joke! You grinned and shrugged with a little too much ego. 

"Nobody here is really used to that… Feelin' powerless doesn't go down to well," Bucky said. 

"I'm not…" but you couldn't find the right word; they all seemed a little too cliché. 

"Evil? Tryna' kill us, take over the world and all that?" he offered, serving the exact cliché up on a platter. When you nodded, he mirrored your action. "I know. They do too. Can't always trust your gut though," 

"What does your gut say about me?" you asked, the words slipping straight out of your head from where they had popped into your head. The environment was too foreign, the situation too peculiar for you to be self-conscious. That saved you from being embarrassed. 

"That you're dangerous," Bucky answered as quickly as you had asked the question. "But… you're tellin' the truth. You're scared." 

Hearing the words out loud forced you into some sort of confrontation with the emotion. You were scared. So, so fucking scared. Tears began to roll down your face and your teeth gnawed at the inside of your cheeks. 

He hesitated, but Bucky stepped closer and carefully held your shoulders. The pressure was grounding, even on each side. You looked up at him, sniffling. His expression was soft, neutral, warm. 

"You're safe here," he told you. "I know how you feel… Trust me." 

You tried to start your sentence, but it kept halting between tears. "I don't know what I'm meant to do now," you finally got out. 

Bucky sighed, offered a small lopsided smile, and nodded. "I know, darlin'," he whispered, then pulled you into a hug. 

Folding your arms up between your chest and his, you felt enclosed. Safe in a bubble. It didn't occur to you to think about how strange it all was. It didn't even occur to Bucky to think about how out of character he was being. Maybe it was because it wasn't really, not if you were judging him by pre-WWII Bucky standards. This was who he used to be, before it all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please read the note at the start! If it's too long - just the second paragraph is okay! Love ya!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A decision is made. A plan is formed. Bucky has a request.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A longer chapter for you! I'd very much appreciate feedback, and even if you have little wishes for how the story unfolds. Comments honestly push me to write.

From the Potomac River to Romania, Bucky had simply tried to exist. Be the market customer, the guy on the bus, the man walking by that nobody remembered. Just… exist. But, since Shuri pulling trigger words from his brain and Wakandan doctors doing their best to undo the years of damage to his body, Bucky had felt like he was existing to make up for his life before. 

Every day was an act of redemption. Each thing he did, a beg for forgiveness. And it was easy for him to live like that, despite Steve telling him he didn't owe the world anything and Sam's honest trauma counselling lines over pizza, and even The Avengers' ultimate adoption of him, Bucky still felt indebted and it was simply the easiest way to live. 

Standing in the middle of your limbo, Bucky could feel the way you were pressed into him, leaning all your weight onto him. It was how Steve used to hug him before the war broke out, like if Bucky moved, Steve's entire centre of gravity would be ripped out from under him. Steve relied on Bucky back then. It was what you were doing now. He wasn't indebted to you. 

What did that mean? How was he meant to act around you? Talk to you? 

Bucky didn't move first, he gave you all the time in the world. Eventually, you slowly uncurled yourself and let Bucky have his arms back. Your eyelashes were clumped together with tears. Suddenly self-conscious, you took a step back and wiped the tears and snot away with the sleeve of your shirt. Sniffling, you looked around a little hopelessly. 

"Uh… Did ya need anythin'? I know a cup of tea helps Wanda when she's upset… or Peanut Butter Cups put Steve in a good mood. Must be a psychological thing, 'cause of the syrum..." He was rambling just a bit, but it was sweet. It was also an insight. You wondered if he ever made Wanda's tea, or if he just watched and noticed things. 

"I… um… I… don't know," you replied honestly. 

Bucky nodded. "Yeah… Alright… I, uh, just came to see if you were okay… as you can be. Only thing that's gonna make you feel much better is knowing what's going on, yeah?" 

"Yep," you answered quietly, wrapping your arms around yourself. 

With another nod and a gentle squeeze of your arm, Bucky vacated the room. The door was left unlocked. 

…

The bed beneath you was getting more and more comfortable the longer you waited for Wanda, Bucky, or someone else to deliver your fate. If you forced your heavy eyelids to remain open, the room wouldn't stay still. Any chance of coherent thinking was lost hours ago. You'd not slept in over thirty hours, and your body was damn well aware of that. 

Of the places you could be, Stark Tower was certainly one of the safest. Regardless, you felt hyper-aware of potential threats, entirely scared at the prospect of being kicked out onto the street with no help, and constantly watched by the security camera in the corner of the room. 

Biology is a bitch. Despite desperately trying to remain awake and alert, you passed out before The Avengers had even come to a conclusion about you. When they finally did, Tony asked F.R.I.D.A.Y. to bring up the feed to your room. 

"Which one of you wants'ta wake up Sleeping Beauty?" he asked, feeling a little sorry for you. 

"Let her sleep," Steve replied, glancing over at Bucky. "We'll sort it out in the morning. She needs sleep and something to eat before she'll be able to tell us anything," 

"Anything else," Wanda clarified. "She told us plenty." 

Everyone agreed, then headed to their separate spaces in the Tower. Steve and Bucky were last out, both watching over your sleeping image on the screen. 

"F.R.I.D.A.Y., let me… us… know when she wakes up," Steve requested, then slung an arm around his oldest friend and steered him from the room. "You wanna talk about it?" 

… 

The blinds started to rise, letting in the New York morning light. It burned your eyes at first, but quickly the breathtaking view distracted you from the abrupt awakening. You walked to the windows and looked out over the city. Of the millions of people living down there, what made you special enough to be on someone's watch list? A sharp reminder-

"Wakey, wakey!" Tony called as he entered the room with a knock or pause. 

Instinctively, you swung around and yelled, "Stop!" 

He froze. Entirely. It was lucky that the life-supporting bodily functions were automatic and unconscious; your power didn't control those. You could keep Tony still and he wouldn't stop breathing. Unless you wanted him to. 

Almost as still as Tony, you looked at him in shock. He'd startled you into a reaction, but now you were too scared of his to let him unfreeze. 

Before you had to though, the gentle but firm voice of Captain America could be heard from the hallway behind Tony. "Y/N?" he called softly. "I'm coming in." He appeared, dressed in casual jeans and a black t-shirt. He had his hands out, like you were a cornered animal he wanted to subdue. Walking passed Tony, Steve kept his eyes on you. 

"I'm sorry," you whispered out, another relatively instinctual response. 

Steve nodded. "I know. He knows too. Wanna let him go?" 

"You can move," you directed at Tony. 

Tony's body relaxed and he dramatically shook himself out. You expected hell, but instead Tony looked over you with some suspicion, but more interest. Then to Steve, "Thanks, Cap," 

"Thought we agreed-"

"I know, I know. You're little sad squad would come get her. I was just in the neighbourhood, thought I'd drop by, you know." 

Yeah, he knew. Steve was well and truly acquainted with Tony Stark's unpredictable behaviour. He just stared at Tony until he got the hint. 

"Right. Well then," Tony said, stepping backwards toward the open door. "Guess I'll see you later. Good chat, Y/N. Nice playin' with you." Both you and Steve watched him walk out the door, then jump in surprise. "Christ, Barnes!" He looked back at Steve, pointing to, you presumed, Bucky standing outside in the hall. "Why's he gotta creep around like this?" He shook his head at Bucky, then walked away. 

Bucky stepped out of hiding and into the doorway. 

"F.R.I.D.A.Y. let us know you woke," Steve said to you, turning his attention from Bucky to where you were still standing in front of the window. Wanda had explained Stark Tower's AI system. If you needed anything, ask F.R.I.D.A.Y. It was a little unnerving to think about, so you hadn't. 

"Are you okay?" Bucky asked, moving as slowly as Steve had, but without the hesitation. He came to a stop in front of you, watching as you nodded. "Don't worry 'bout Stark… He's… I don't know… _him_, but he's alright. Forgiving, at the least," he told you. 

Everybody knew The Winter Soldier had killed a lot of people. Everybody knew who many of those people were. 

"I'm okay," you said, sensing neither Steve nor Bucky were going to move unless you gave them something. 

"Did you get some sleep?" Steve asked. It seemed genuine. 

"Yeah, a little," 

"Good, that's good. Let's go get some breakfast. We can talk, if you want to," he offered. His body language had softened considerably, probably from the point of you letting Tony go. He was still being cautious though. While you figured it was because Steve was wary of you, he and Bucky knew it was because he was not used to how Bucky was behaving. He had declined Steve's invitation to talk about it, about you, the previous night. 

…

The kitchen wasn't really a kitchen. Serving the joining conference rooms and corporate spaces, the kitchenette mostly saw coffee and ordered-in baked goods. Somebody though, had the good thought to go one step further this morning. 

Wanda was unpacking takeaway containers of real-deal cooked breakfast food. She looked entirely domestic, like if you didn't know she was _the_ Scarlet Witch, you'd think she was simply a beautiful woman, and in this case, one gong out of her way to make you feel safe. 

"I think this was Pepper," she said in lieu of a good morning. 

Steve had entered the room first, you tailing him obediently. He motioned at a bar stool, inviting you to sit. 

Why you did it, you weren't sure, but you turned to glance to Bucky behind you. "Sit," he nudged gently, taking up the stood next to yours. 

A plate was put in front of you. Steve and Wanda began to chat, unguarded and natural - which you took as a good sign. They both ate, as did Bucky but he stayed as quiet as you. It was more hospitality than you'd expected, and you didn't want to be rude or ungrateful. However, the nerves and fear coursing through you stopped any chance of being hungry. Bucky subtly watched you push food around on the plate. 

"Steve," he said, concluding nobody was getting down to business, so to speak. 

Steve genuinely looked confused at first, then he clocked your uneaten food and still-panicked body language. He would have always helped you - even if not through The Avengers. He had forgotten that people's idea of him had changed over the past few years. He wasn't America's golden boy anymore. Not perfect. Not always law-abiding. Once upon a time, someone like you could show up and know categorically that Captain America would save them. It wasn't like that anymore. You were waiting, unsure.

"You can stay here, Y/N," Steve said, a little bit rushed. "We watched overnight to see if anybody… lingered around. Nobody's come looking for you yet." 

"But we believe you," Wanda added. "We'll find them." 

"Well- we will do our best," he clarified. Steve then looked over at Bucky, as if he expected him to add something. Bucky remained silent. 

Saying 'thank you' didn’t feel like enough. Before you got even that out, Steve continued. "Tony's letting you use one of the living quarters," 

"You'll be near me," from Wanda. 

"It's just Wanda and Buck living here right now, but the rest of us are always around. And there isn't a more secure building in the world," Steve assured you. The fact that you'd easily found your way into the heart of it the night before crossed everyone's minds. Nobody mentioned it. 

"Why do you still live here?" you asked Bucky, almost automatically. It just slipped out. You'd assumed wherever Steve Rogers went, Bucky Barnes would follow. 

Bucky's blank expression almost faltered. "Not really trusted yet," he told you. 

"Buck-" Steve said at the same time as Wanda began, "By you. Everybody else trusts you. You're free to go whenever you want," 

"So are you," Bucky pointedly replied. 

They looked at each other for a moment, their respective ghosts catching up. 

"Anyway," Steve cut in, "You should head home, grab what you need. We'll figure it out from there, okay?" He rested his palm on your arm in a soft gesture. 

"By myself?" you asked quietly. All three of the Avengers could hear the fear in your voice. 

In your life, you had been forced to live on the cusp of hyperawareness at all times. Self-monitoring was the natural consequence of not wanting to out yourself or hurt anybody. A side effect of the monitoring was being able to read other people exceptionally well. Take for instance this moment in the kitchenette of Stark Tower. The truth was not being told. Wanda fidgeting with her teacup, Steve's watchful eyes attempting to assess your belief… They were dead giveaways. 

"It's best that nobody knows you've come to us," Steve explained. "If whoever it is following you are planning something, it may just speed up their timeline." 

He probably wasn't wrong. But it also wasn't everything. 

"Answer this question truthfully: why do you want me to go alone?" 

Wanda's eyes went wide as Steve immediately started to talk. "Officially we didn't record anybody outside the Tower but Buck saw someone a block down that isn't normally there. We sent an agent to approach, and they were posed as living with homelessness, but it was an obvious cover. We're sending you home to test if they'll follow you." 

There were two seconds of silence when he finished. 

"Well…" Wanda sighed out, sipping at her tea. 

"That… doesn't feel good," Steve said, feeling disorientated. 

From next to you, Bucky chuckled to himself. You turned and shot him a look. "It's not funny!" Abruptly standing, you launched the others to do the same, falling into defensive positions. "You said I'd be safe and now you're using me as bait," 

"Y/N, we know-"

"No, you don't fucking know," you interrupted Steve. "I've got-got this thing… this power that I don't want and now people I don't know are hunting me and I don't know how they know about it and it's fucking terrifying! And I work up the courage to come here and risk gettin' shot by Iron Man or whatever to get help and you're just sending me out there to see if anything happens?!" 

"You're right," Bucky says, stopping you from continuing with not so much _what_ he said but with the volume of his voice. It was the loudest you'd heard him speak. He stepped closer to you, relaxed his shoulders. "You've got every right to be pissed. But you're not exactly defenceless, and we don't have a lot to go on here." He took another step closer; he was at an arm's length. "We shouldn't have lied, but we didn't know how you'd react. Can't blame us for being careful. I'm sorry, Rhiannon… But we ain't gonna let anything happen to you, trust us." 

The Avengers had been through hell, some more than others. All of them though, knew what it meant to be afraid of themselves and for their lives. This had very reasonably left them with depleted trust levels but maximum empathy, arguably, none more than Bucky Barnes. So maybe it was only Bucky that could have asked for trust and received it. 

You nodded, trying to breathe properly. 

"Here," Bucky said, closing some of the space between you and reaching for your hand. He lifted it to your nose then demonstrated what to do on himself. "Breath in one way," he told you, closing one nostril. "Breath out the other." He switched. 

Following his lead, you breathed in, breathed out. In. Out. It worked. With your breathing regulated you felt slightly more in control. 

"I'm sorry," you said to step, looking behind Bucky at Steve. 

"It's okay; you're scared. But we're going to help you, Rhiannon." 

…

The elevator music was not the usual. Maybe Tony's Spotify was directly connected to it, you thought on the ride down. Maybe it was F.R.I.D.A.Y. making the building more Stark-esque. It helped to think about the music rather than the fact you were about to step back out into the city. 

"You wanna go over the route again?" Bucky asked. He was leaning against the elevator wall, adjacent to you. He'd been watching you since leaving the kitchenette. 

In a boardroom you had been shown the planned route you'd take home, and where each Avenger would be located. It was just Steve, Wanda, Sam and Peter Parker. The kid had been called in when Natasha received one of her mysterious messages and disappeared into the night. Everybody else was out on missions or taking time off. You and your tail weren't exactly a high priority. Agents in civilian attire would be on the street too, just in case. 

From the boardroom, you'd been put back in your limbo bedroom for a couple of hours while the plan was put into motion. 

When Bucky returned to collect you, he'd changed out of the sweatpants and white t-shirt he was wearing and into his uniform. You'd not seen it before, on the news or the internet or anywhere else. You'd never know he had a vibranium Wakandan-made arm. Bucky's long hair was pulled into a bun. 

"No," you replied quietly, glancing over at him. 

His watching was both unnerving and reassuring. You'd never want to be on the wrong side of Bucky Barnes, formally The Winter Soldier. Luckily, you weren't.

"You can make me, if you want," he said then. 

Fully turning to him, your anxious expression turned to confusion. "Make you do what?" 

"Tell me to make sure you get home and back here in one piece. If you make me, I gotta, right?" he asked, with a way too casual shrug of the shoulder. Bucky's lips were curved upwards just enough that you could catch it, but he didn't look like he was waiting for you to laugh. It wasn't a joke. 

"Aren't you gonna do that anyway?" 

"Course, but…" When he paused he read your face for any minute micro-expression. How much of the truth could you handle? "Get an order, complete it like a good soldier. Makes it easier. Keeps you one-track-minded." He'd settled for part of the truth. Only a small part. 

It became very clear that Bucky was asking you to make him obey, although you didn't know why. Reaching out to the elevator control panel, you hit the emergency stop. When the elevator did in fact, stop, you were a bit surprised. Dramatically stopping an elevator was something people only did in movies. It had amused Bucky though, that was evident in the dimples on his cheeks formed when his small smirk grew too wide. 

"Make sure I get to my house safely. Help me get what I need, and bring me back here," you told Bucky as you leaned back against the wall opposite his. 

The smile dropped from his face, along with any shade of expression. You could see your power in his eyes. 

Bucky nodded, you started the elevator, and the rest of the ride was silent.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh no. Does Bucky Barnes ~~~like~~~ the feeling your powers gives? Ouch.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bridging chapter. You have to leave behind the life you knew.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Straight out of the past, I'm back with a chapter of this fic. It's been a looooong ass time. Please, let me know if you like it enough for me to keep going! Thank you! ALSO if you notice any continuity issues, let me know that too. Hopefully haven't contradicted details and facts of the first three chapters.   
Edit: Interactive Fics chrome extension changes "Y/N" to whatever name you want... but it also did that when I posted fics... so now my name is in all my fics instead of Y/N. Yikes. Embarrassing. Editing them all now. Kill me.

There was nothing comforting about having Stark-employed agents tailing you. Logically you knew that besides maybe a well-placed and patient sniper, nobody would be able to get close enough to hurt you. Not with spiders and witches and falcons watching over you. Certainly not with the last remaining Howling Commandos on your side. 

Although you couldn't see him, even when you tried to covertly spot him, you could _feel_ Bucky. You could feel him watching you and you knew it was him because it wasn't like before. It didn't make you feel sick with dread. 

All of that was probably in your head though. 

More tangible aspects of the situation were the beads of sweat rolling down your spine and pooling in the small of your back. Very real was the awkward pace you were keeping - definitely faster than a casual walk but a solid attempt to appear calm and normal. 

It had been decided that you would walk the entire way home. It was doable, but you'd usually catch the bus. The people who wanted you would have to see the future to know when and where you'd catch a bus, but that wasn't outside the realm of possibility. Not anymore. So, you walked for 40 minutes.

…

Unless he wanted you to see him, Bucky Barnes was invisible. He'd always been good at camouflage, but programming by Hydra included 'how to disappear 101.' And under your power, it was like that again. Not a single soul saw Bucky as he followed you block by block. There wasn't even a gust of wind left in his wake to alert people that someone… _something,_ had gone by. 

Entirely focussed and keen eyed, Bucky watched your strange gait. If there was no power clouding his mind, he would have smirked a little; even Hydra couldn't take the sass out of him. 

After he climbed through an unlocked bedroom window and landed on the floor behind you, Bucky stood up straight at attention. You were on your hands and knees, pulling things out of the bottom of a closet. There was a duffle bag in there somewhere, you were sure. 

"Yes!" you whispered to yourself, standing and spinning around. The yelp that escaped your mouth sounded through Bucky's earpiece to the other Avengers situated in, on, and around your apartment building. 

"Buck?" Steve asked, muscles already poised to move. 

"Package is safe," Bucky replied, no emotion in his voice. The lack of it went unnoticed by Peter Parker - who was still too new and in awe to know Bucky beyond reputation and limited interaction. He didn't mean to, but Bucky had avoided Peter; he reminded him too much of pre-serum Steve. However, Wanda, Sam, and Steve all heard the tone, and all frowned to themselves from their respective positions. Nobody did anything though. 

"You scared me," you said as soon as you yelped. When he didn't move, speak, or even shrug it off, you were reminded of your spell. A small, sad, "Oh," was uttered. "Stop. You can stop your… mission," you ordered him. 

It didn't work. Maybe it wasn't specific enough. Without a lot of practice, you really weren't good at using your power when you actually needed to. You realised that you shouldn't have given Bucky a complex and prolonged order in the elevator. 

"Ah… Relax. Be yourself…?" you tried. Bucky's blue eyes simply remained fixed on you and he went to speak, but you cut him off. "Oh! Ignore my previous order. Do not… feel compelled… to… Fuck. What did I tell you to do?" 

"Make sure I get to my house safely. Help me get what I need, and bring me back here," Bucky said, repeating your command word-for-word. It was unnerving. 

"Yeah… Don't… Don't do that. Unless you want to. Only do that if you want to." 

When his posture gave (by only the slightest amount), you breathed out. It had worked, but you weren't sure exactly which part.

"Bucky?" you asked gently. Bucky smiled and it felt like rain in a drought. "You okay?" 

He nodded, being much more used to giving non-verbal responses. Sam's voice was in his head though, encouraging him to speak, pushing his recovery forward faster than Steve's love alone could do. "Yeah, I'm fine…" 

You could hear it in his slow drawl- that slight cognitive lag people sometimes experienced after your power left their minds and they were free again. 

"I'm sorry," 

"No, darling', you don't have to keep saying that. It's alright," 

"But-"

"Please," he interrupted. He shook his head slightly, but it was enough for you to see he didn't want to talk about it. "You did good," 

"I just… walked," you replied. 

"Yeah, but that isn't easy when you think someone's about to kill ya," 

"Wow. Reassuring. Thanks," you said sarcastically, moving around him to put the bag on the bed. 

Bucky chuckled, then sat down next to the bag. 

"Aren't you gonna, like, check the cupboards and stuff?" 

He raised an eyebrow. "Christ, how unprofessional do you think we are?" From the dresser you were digging through, you looked over at him and shrugged in confusion. "Stark had people in here as soon as he figured out where _here_ was," 

"Guessing that was pretty quick?" 

"Yep," Bucky replied, popping the P sound purposefully. 

"So, random people have been going through my stuff?" Looking around, nothing seemed out of place. It was unnerving, actually. 

"Not random. People Stark trusts,"

"Do you trust them?" 

But he hesitated and he saw that you'd seen. He couldn't but smile a little. "I don't _not_ trust them." 

Thinking for a couple seconds, you decided on, "Probably fair…" 

Bucky nodded, and you continued to pack. He decided it wasn't worth telling you that in the very early hours of the morning, after the city was asleep and just before the sun woke up, he'd gone to your apartment too. Clues in the cupboards. Secrets under the seats. Anything really. Steve had been awake when Bucky slipped out. He'd thought maybe Bucky was checking for Hydra. Or possibly, Steve hoped, his best friend was driven by the fact that you looked a lot like a couple of the girls Bucky had charmed before the war meant anything to them. 

Bucky followed you as you went room by room, filling the duffle, then a backpack, then an empty shopping bag. 

"You planning on never coming back here?" he asked, mostly joking. When you stopped, moving like a deer in the headlights, Bucky realised. "Oh…" 

"Am I? Am I coming back?" you asked, on the cusp of hopeful. The glimmer of it in your eyes killed Bucky. 

"I don't know," he answered, voice a little too soft to be comforting. 

Looking around your apartment, you tried to look brave. "I guess… it doesn't really matter. Hadn't really built much of a life anyway," 

"Of course it matters, Y/N." 

Before you could say anything else, there was a loud knock on your door, followed by the shrill voice of your neighbour. "Y/N?! Did I just hear ya come home?! Where've ya been?!" 

You and Bucky turned to each other at the same time, both expecting the other to do something. 

"She's not gonna go away," you whispered. 

"Make her," Bucky said. 

"I don't want to use-"

"No," Bucky interrupted. "Just _talk_ to her…" His tone implied the _'obviously.'_

As soon as you swung the door open, Barb went to step in. 

"Ah, sorry, Barb. Bit of a mess in here… Did you need… something?" you said, stopping her. 

She eyed you suspiciously, tried to look past you. "You didn't come home last night," 

"Stayed at a friend's," 

"That's lovely… Which friend? That nice Lisa girl?" 

"No, um, new friend. James." 

Bucky _almost_ laughed. 

"A boy? I didn't realise you were dating." She emphasised the last word like it was taboo. 

Normally, you'd be better at dealing with Barb; she meant well, but was incredibly nosey. Normally, you didn't answer all her rapid-fire questions immediately, but you were nervous. 

"It's not like that. He's just a friend,"

"That you spent the night with," 

"Barb, it's 2020. We can be friends with guys now,"

"So defensive, Y/N! Must really like him," she said with a knowing smile. 

"I'm just on my way out, actually," 

"Such a social butterfly all of a sudden. I was just coming over to see if you're alright," 

"I'm alright. And I appreciate it. I really do. I'm just… a bit busy right now," 

"Alright, alright," Barb said, holding her hands up in surrender. "I know when I'm not welcome-" 

"No, Barb, it's not-"

"No, no, it's fine." She took a step backwards. 

"Barb-"

"When will you be home then?" 

_Fuck._

You tried to look over your shoulder into your apartment as casually as possible. Glancing at Bucky, all he could offer was a shrug. You realised then that you would have to lie, _really_ lie. 

"Actually… Might be gone for a while. Got family upstate that need me." 

Barb was quiet for a second, searching through everything she knew about you. "I hope everyone's alright," she settled on. She wanted to say that she didn't know you had family upstate… or any family at all, for that matter. 

You'd lived in the apartment complex for five or so years. Barb had always looked out for you, especially since her kid went off to college. She'd met a couple of your friends, heard about work, but never once had you spoken about family. Barb hadn't pressed, although she very much wanted to. Something inside her was keeping her from doing so. 

"Yeah, yep… They will be," you replied, nodding. 

"Okay… Well, you'll have to come over for tea when you get back?" 

"I will. Thanks, Barb." 

She left. 

Bucky watched you close the door, lock it out of habit. 

Your eyes were full of tears. "I can't come back here," you whispered to him. "If someone is after me, I can't bring them here," 

"They probably already know where 'here' is," Bucky replied, almost immediately knowing it was the wrong thing to say. "But," he quickly added. "If they were gonna do anything, they'd done that already." 

Bucky didn't believe that to be true at all. More likely, the people following you, upon discovering your sudden disappearance, would try to draw you out. If they knew Barb was a friend - it could make her a target. 

You watched Bucky's expression. You read the lie. You didn't need to force the truth out though. You let the fact that he was _trying_ to reassure you, reassure you. 

"We'll keep surveillance here." 

You nodded, moved slowly to continue packing. 

Bucky stayed quiet, watched, tried to remember all the details of your apartment. Maybe they'd come in useful at some point. 

"Okay, I'm ready," you announced. 

"There's a car downstairs waiting for you," Bucky said. 

"You're not coming?"

"I'll go out the way I came," he answered. When you didn't move, he added, "You'll be okay… Steve and everyone… they'll look after you." He wasn't lying that time. "Go." 

Slinging bags over your shoulder, you nodded and left Bucky Barnes in the apartment you would never return to. 

What would happen to the rest of your stuff? Would Stark pay for a storage unit? Pay your rent? What about work? 

By the time you got to the car, you were again, on the verge of tears. 

Upstairs, from a window of your apartment, Bucky watched you leave. He made a note to tell someone to teach you not to get into cars without checking if it was safe first. You hadn't even asked to see the driver's ID. 

"She's aboard," Bucky relayed into coms. 

"Copy that," Steve's voice came back. "Buck?" 

Bucky was in his head. 

For longer than Steve liked.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on Tumblr @ BuckyReaderRecs. I compile lists of people that post Bucky x Reader fics on Tumblr. Eww!


End file.
